I'm in a bus... with some people... WE are in a bus... speeding away in a deserted desert. All seems smooth... until: Look out! Watch out! A FIRE blazing through ahead of us. The smoke is everywhere... the panic is everywhere... Turn around! Faster! Faster! The bus curves away... a big curve, a turn around... and we're good. All is good again. All is good now. The fire is behind us. We are once again driving in a deserted desert. And then? Then -- I wake up.
A dream. A dream that stores more drama in it than most of my days on earth.
Dreams do that - they show us a grander world; a deeper world; a gateway to our INNER world. I wake up, hold on to the stark image of the bus... the fire... the panic... the fear.... and I rush to find the meaning: I ask google for the meaning of my dream, I check my dream book, I ask my boyfriend.... but none of them has the answer for me. The fire can be a good omen, a bad one, it can be about passion, about anger, about creativity, about wisdom... the myths don't have a consensus here, and I start wondering: Well then, can the meaning be... whatever I THINK it could be? A sort of 'power to the dreamers'? If it is a message in a bottle from my self to, well, my self... than how can I find my inner life in a wikipedia page some nerd filled out? Or in a book? Or through someone else's inner life? I can't.
The dream means whatever it means TO ME.
And then I wonder: maybe this dream is to remind me that I, that WE, are always just inches away from the next burn, from the next destruction, from the next creative outpour, from the next transformation... and sure -- we can turn around and be safe, and stay in the same place we were.
Or... maybe next time I can walk THROUGH the fire. Through to the other side, whatever it would be. OUT of the deserted desert. Out to the great unknown.
After all -- there is no way out but through.
In April 2020, while experiencing her first ever global pandemic, Tamar Pelzig pledged to write something every day, even if it's only a word, so she welcomed to the world a daily blog to keep her creative writing wheels rolling.
Header Art: Daniel Landerman