The Stories We Tell Ourselves
From the moment we are born (and some will say even long before), we are conditioned to behave in society. We are taught to walk, to talk, and to function as best as our parents know how to teach us. And that is as early as stories start circulating in our brains and our bodies. (and some will say - the stories start long before...)
We learn what is 'right' and 'wrong', what's 'good' or 'bad', what is a 'positive' and a 'negative' and an array of other less dual lessons we craft stories out of.
For some of us, learning what is perceived as 'right' and 'wrong' may lead to stories like 'I'm always doing something wrong.' For others - 'I'm always right'.
Other common stories we tell ourselves are 'I'm a failure', 'There's something wrong with me', 'I'm invisible', 'The world is out to get me.' and more... You may be thinking right this second: what is MY core belief that I'm in a complete blind spot on?
These stories - or 'Samskaras as Indian philosophers would call these belief imprints - are formed so early on, that they continue to unconsciously 'run' us over as we grow older. They may appear as a loud volatile emotional trigger, or as a subtle reaction or response to events in our lives. So, say we were rejected by a prospective lover? Our mind will bring up the familiar story of 'I'm a loser'. We see a police car pulling by and immediately the story 'The world is out to get me' can appear. To some, it's the 'I'm special' story that pops up in situations, and sometimes - our core beliefs can serve us well. They likely were formed (and don't quote me on this - I am not a psychologist or a behavior scientist, I'm purely a curious human!) to protect us in one way or another.
But more often than not - what protected us early on in life in one scenario or another, can be quite damaging and can create separation between us and the actual event of the moment. In other words...: we get 'triggered', lose some perspective of the situation, and we may end up taking part or creating a conflict.
If we are not digging deep and looking into our core beliefs about ourselves and ourselves IN the world - how do we know we are not operating from some sort of a blind spot? Well, no matter how aware we may be... or think we are... a blind spot is - well - BLIND.
It seems like are always running on SOME story... be it the narrative of the society we are in, our core beliefs, or even the fantasy of what we wish the moment was.
We are storytellers and story-makers.
When we like it - and when sadly - we do not.
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In April 2020, while experiencing her first ever global pandemic, Tamar Pelzig pledged to write something every day, even if it's only a word, so she welcomed to the world a daily blog to keep her creative writing wheels rolling.
Header Art: Daniel Landerman