The Shoulds Gotta Go
They say the older one gets, the wiser she gets.
Who are 'they' exactly, I don't know. But I'd say the saying has some truth in it.
I have a lot more growing up to do, but one thing I've already noticed I am shedding away: The shoulds.
You know the shoulds? Yeah, you know them. They pop up a few times a day, when you should have done this, or should have said that... or when you contemplate something and really think you should this and that about it... and that you really really better shouldn't whatever about it.
It's when you are trying to squeeze yourself into a pattern, a belief, at all possible costs. Be it with the life you SHOULD have, or the person you SHOULD be.
You 'should' really means that you DON'T fit the mold, but that you BETTER.
Because if you don't.... then you'll at best have some raised eyebrows to deal with, and at worse - a family drama that you'd be apologizing for, for years to come.
The dictionary (of my beloved Mrs. Google) says that SHOULD is:
*used to indicate obligation, duty, or correctness, typically when criticizing someone's actions.
That definition alone stirs me in a direction of 'to hell with the shoulds.' Life is too short (or is it?!) to operate out of the feeling of obligation, duty or correctness. And criticizing someone feels awful, as is being criticized.
So I say SHOULD GOTTA GO.
It just GOTTA. It GOTTA. It GOTTA GO.
So, dear 'should',
You and I are finito. We're done. Goin' our separate ways for once and for all.
Find yourself someone who actually wants to fit into some mold, because I sure DON'T.
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In April 2020, while experiencing her first ever global pandemic, Tamar Pelzig pledged to write something every day, even if it's only a word, so she welcomed to the world a daily blog to keep her creative writing wheels rolling.
Header Art: Daniel Landerman