When I was little, and pretty much every day still, I had fantasies, and dreams, and ambitions to be super mega accomplished. Successful. Fulfill my potential no matter what. I've made choices all in line with that NEED to accomplish. But as life does what, well, life DOES - which is whatever it wants to do on any given time like a badass - I've accomplished some of my goals and dreams, and other ones I definitely did not. Some of my dreams changed, and that's okay. I ended up accomplishing things I have never dreamt of, and also failed in things I never aspired for anyways.
This current pause in society put us all in either crisis mode, survival mode, or zen mode. For me, it also sent a rocket right to the heart of my need to accomplish.
I once told my therapist that I'd rather die than being unsuccessful. That 'once', was merely last year. Well, in proper psychology lingo let me 'reframe' that notion: I'd rather die than not live fully. Living fully means following the waves that life takes me on. Be it a break-up, a loss, a goal achieved, a mountain climbed on, or even a global pandemic that swept the world completely out of nowhere and made us all STOP and LISTEN.
Listen to the sound of the wave coming at you. What do you hear?
I hear "You ARE accomplished. You have been born and whole and loved and full of gifts. Now fly off and do whatever you want to do on any given time like a badass."
In April 2020, while experiencing her first ever global pandemic, Tamar Pelzig pledged to write something every day, even if it's only a word, so she welcomed to the world a daily blog to keep her creative writing wheels rolling.
Header Art: Daniel Landerman